Welcome to Aspire Family Mediation
Are you:
- looking for a cost effective service to your separation/divorce/children issues
- trying to avoid the cost and tension of going to court
- looking to fix disputes without big legal costs and increased communication breakdown?
No matter what your issue, the opportunities are that you will benefit from mediating your issues instead of spend months and possibly years in the court . There is now a requirement to go to a mediation session before providing applications for a Financial Solution, or applications in relation to child matters. There are exceptions to this requirement, which can be talked about with a mediator when calling us on 01908 966008
Who can see a benefit from mediation?
- Grandparents
- Unmarried Parents
- Married Couples
- Civil Partners
- Cohabiting couples
WILL IT LOOK BAD IF I DECLINE TO GO TO MEDIATION?
Mediation is a voluntary procedure, although the courts can and will look at the conduct of both parties prior to and during the court proceedings. A vital part of this is showing you have acted fairly and attempted alternate kinds of conflict resolution, such as family mediation and followed court procedures.
BACKGROUND
Since April 2014 it has been a legal requirement to participate in a MIAM to help you think about the advantages of family mediation and be assessed for suitability prior to you can submit an application to the court for a child arrangements or financial order.
There reasons for this consisted of, but were not restricted to:
- The courts were ending up being overwhelmed with cases
- Much of the cases could, and probably should, have been solved without the need to go to court
- Court is not always the very best location to resolve problems concerning a household matter
- The government consider that mediation is a much better method to resolve problems on a divorce or separation, or an argument on child arrangements.
DO I HAVE TO GO TO MEDIATION?
In order to send an application to the court you need to show that you have at least considered family mediation, by way of participating in a Mediation Information Assessment Meeting called a MIAM. A MIAM is accepted a family mediator who will explain how mediation works, evaluate whether it is best for your case and answer any concerns or concerns you might have about mediation. You can read our guide to a MIAM here.
In some cases you might be exempt from going to a MIAM, for instance if you have been a victim of domestic abuse and have the relevant proof, or if a child is at impending threat.
I HAVE GOTTEN COURT DOCUMENTS BUT I WAS NOT INVITED TO GO TO MEDIATION– WHY IS THAT?
This might be because the other party either satisfies one of the MIAM exemptions or because they have attended a MIAM and either the mediator or other party have decided that family mediation is not ideal.
If you have received forms from the court for financial or child plans, it is necessary you respond to them and go to court on the offered day. Otherwise a decision could be made in your absence, which would be legally binding. You need to take good independent legal advice where possible.
If you wish to go to family mediation, you can approach the other party and recommend this, or write to their solicitor recommending family mediation. You can likewise notify the judge that you would prefer to deal with the problem through family mediation. The judge will then decide on how your case need to proceed.
WHAT IF THE JUDGE THINKS ABOUT THE CASE IS SUITABLE FOR MEDIATION?
If the court believes it would be much better for you both to attempt to reach an arrangement through mediation, then the judge can direct the case is adjourned a couple of months whilst you both try and resolve the matters through mediation. This direction can be at any stage of the proceedings– often the judge might offer an indication of what they would order and then ask you to moderate out the specific information in between you.
If you are directed to try mediation by a judge, you still do not need to do it– among the 5 pillars of family mediation is that it is always voluntary– but the judge would wish to know why you have actually refrained from doing as they recommended and your conduct might be considered when it concerns granting expenses and in the final judgement
CAN MY SOLICITOR DECIDE MEDIATION IS NOT SUITABLE?
No, only a mediator can choose if mediation is not ideal for your case. Once they have made such a decision, mediation ought to not take place, unless the scenarios have changed since that decision was made. In such cases, you might want to participate in a new MIAM to see if mediation is now suitable.
Your mediator can say whether they think one of the 15 exemptions to mediation need to apply to your situation.
I HAVE BEEN INVITED TO MEDIATION– DO I NEED TO RESPOND?
Yes, you should respond to the mediation service who contacts you. The mediator will be neutral and it does not matter who has been seen by them. The mediator will generally want to see each of you by yourself before any joint mediation sessions can happen.
If you don’t react or refuse mediation without a great reason, you will need to explain why you refused mediation to the judge, if your case subsequently goes to court.
WILL IT BE HELD VERSUS ME IF I DO NOT ATTEND MEDIATION?
Whilst mediation is always voluntary, you will be asked to show that you have attempted mediation or attended a Mediation Information Assessment Meeting (MIAM) before you can proceed to the courts.
MEDIATION FOR CHILD PLANS ORDERS
The judge will generally be asked to decide on with whom the children will stay with and when. They may be making a decision on a specific concern, such as whether the kids can go on a vacation overseas, or which school they will go to.
In deciding such cases, the judge will think about lots of things. The main focus will be on what is in the best interests of the children), their security and their psychological and physical health and well being. Whilst CAFCASS might talk to the children if they are considered old enough and likewise make a report on the parents and their background, the judge will be the individual making the final decision.
It is essential therefore to show the judge that you have acted fairly at all times and that you have put the requirements of the children. Thinking about a resolution of your parenting problems amicably between you, or through mediation, reveals the court you have actually attempted to be an accountable individual and to arrange things out. The judge may not look too kindly on a parent who has actually looked for to frustrate the procedure, not reacted to invites to moderate or sort matters out amicably. Even if you think that would remain in your children’s best interests, the judge might not agree with you.
MEDIATION FOR FINANCIAL MATTERS
In monetary matters the court has discretion to award expenses to the other party. This would be where the legal fees sustained in the procedures are paid in part or in full by the other party. Sometimes there might be an interim expense award and in other cases the judge may decide on expenses at the final hearing. Whilst there does not have to be an award of costs in a financial matter, the key factor in deciding whether costs will be awarded is the conduct of the celebrations involved.
A judge will take a look at how the parties have actually acted prior to and during procedures and check whether court protocols have actually been followed correctly. A crucial aspect of this for all cases is whether mediation or other kinds of alternative disagreement resolution (ADR) were attempted. They will look at whether the costs involved were reasonable to the amount in dispute.
HOW NOT TO APPROACH MEDIATION
- Not responding to an invite to mediation.
- Receiving an invite and denying it had been gotten.
- Scheduling in visits and then constantly cancelling them.
- Insisting on a visit at the weekend or at a date months in the future.
- Insisting that your lawyer or another individual exists at the mediation (you can have somebody in support for your MIAM).
- Declining mediation as you refuse to move from your position.
- Declining mediation as you think the other celebration won’t move from their position.
- Thinking you are 100% right and your case is watertight.
- Not mediating as you do not rely on the other celebration.
- Not moderating as you actually dislike the other celebration.
- You don’t want to remain in the exact same space as the other person (you can do shuttle bus mediation).
- Declining mediation as you can not get child care organised (you would need to get child care organized to participate in court).
- Stating conditions on the mediation taking place. If the other party will concur to something ahead of time, ie only moderating.
The message from the family courts is that mediation should be tried and entered into in good faith, unless an accredited household mediator believes it is not appropriate or one of the 15 exemptions applies.
THERE HAS BEEN DOMESTIC ABUSE IN OUR RELATIONSHIP, DOES THIS MEAN I DO NOT HAVE TO MEDIATE?
If there has been domestic abuse against you in your relationship, possibly as one of the exemptions to going to a MIAM is. Such abuse might be physical, psychological or verbal. You need to offer proof of this exemption, which may be a police recommendation number, domestic abuse charity letter or note from a physician or other health expert. The complete information of evidence needed are described on the appropriate court kinds– Form A for a monetary order and C100 for child plans. You may also finish a C1A which will detail any occurrences of domestic abuse and is sent to court along with the pertinent application.
If you do not have evidence, you will need to discuss this at a MIAM. It might be that they decide mediation is not suitable and sign the court type accordingly.
Some individuals decide to mediate in different spaces by shuttle mediation– which can be held online, where you do not appear on the same screen.
MY EX WON’T MOVE ON THEIR POSITION SO WHAT IS THE POINT OF MEDIATION?
When they go on to joint mediation, 90% of Aspire Family Mediation’s customers reach a contract. The nationwide average is 74%– many more individuals reach an agreement through mediation than don’t. Your ex’s position may be entrenched prior to mediation, however the mediation procedure gives you the opportunity to offer a resolution with your ex partner before you consider court.
I DON’T WANT TO MEDIATE AS I DON’T TRUST THE OTHER PARTY TO MAKE A FULL FINANCIAL DISCLOSURE.
You can ask for monetary disclosure to be carried on a Form E. Purposeful dishonesty on this form can be considered could perhaps put you in contempt of court. Any arrangement reached without a complete disclosure could be ‘set aside’ at a later date and you would need to begin the entire procedure again. It is also most likely that you would be penalised by the court for frustrating the procedure, were you dishonest in your disclosure.
MY EX AND I SIMPLY ARGUE WHENEVER WE DISCUSS THINGS, SO THERE IS NO POINT IN MEDIATION.
The mediator will assist you both have your say and make your points, whilst helping you focus on the problems to be dealt with. Mediation is not about recalling over the relationship, talking about concerns in the past or assigning blame. It has to do with assisting you agree the parenting or monetary arrangements of your divorce or separation as fairly, agreeably and cost-effectively as possible.
I CAN NOT AFFORD MEDIATION, WILL THIS LOOK BAD ON ME?
Have a look here at our blog on who pays for mediation.
If you can not afford mediation and are not qualified for legal aid, then you will need to go to court to solve the situation, unless you can fix the situation between yourselves.
CONCLUSION.
Whilst it is a voluntary procedure, the court will want you to show you have tried to deal with the issue you are asking to make a judgement on in a accountable and affordable manner. To assist this, the law says you need to attend a MIAM to consider family mediation in most cases. The court have wide ranging powers and can guide you to try family mediation, or award costs if you are seen to be annoying the legal process.
If 90% of customers go on to reach a contract and that contract can be reached with less stress, less cost and far quicker than going to court– why would you not want to attempt family mediation?
Click here for details of how to book in a MIAM. You can participate in a MIAM anywhere the world via an online meeting as long as the court jurisdiction is in England & Wales
In order to send an application to the court you must show that you have at least thought about family mediation, by method of attending a Mediation Information Assessment Meeting — called a MIAM. A MIAM is held with a family mediator who will describe how mediation works, evaluate whether it is suitable for your case and answer any issues or concerns you might have about mediation.
About Mediation (WIKIPEDIA)
Mediation is a structured, interactive process where an impartial third party assists disputing parties in resolving conflict through the use of specialsed communication and negotiation techniques. All participants in mediation are encouraged to actively participate in the process. Mediation is a “party-centered” process in that it is focused primarily upon the needs, rights, and interests of the parties.
The mediator uses a wide variety of techniques to guide the process in a constructive direction and to help the parties find their optimal solution. A mediator is facilitative in that she/he manages the interaction between parties and facilitates open communication. Mediation is also evaluative in that the mediator analyzes issues and relevant norms (“reality-testing”), while refraining from providing prescriptive advice to the parties (e.g., “You should do…”).
Mediation, as used in law, is a form of alternative dispute resolution resolving disputes between two or more parties with concrete effects. Typically, a third party, the mediator, assists the parties to negotiate a settlement. Disputants may mediate disputes in a variety of domains, such as commercial, legal, diplomatic, workplace, community, and family matters.
The term mediation broadly refers to any instance in which a third party helps others reach an agreement. More specifically, mediation has a structure, timetable, and dynamics that “ordinary” negotiation lacks. The process is private and confidential, possibly enforced by law. Participation is typically voluntary. The mediator acts as a neutral third party and facilitates rather than directs the process. Mediation is becoming a more peaceful and internationally accepted solution to end the conflict. Mediation can be used to resolve disputes of any magnitude.
The term mediation, however, due to language as well as national legal standards and regulations is not identical in content in all countries but rather has specific connotations, and there are some differences between Anglo-Saxon definitions and other countries, especially countries with a civil, statutory law tradition.
Mediators use various techniques to open, or improve, dialogue and empathy between disputants, aiming to help the parties reach an agreement. Much depends on the mediator’s skill and training. As the practice gained popularity, training programs, certifications, and licensing followed, which produced trained and professional mediators committed to the discipline.
